On My Welsh Heritage

For much of my life, I've had this sort of undercurrent of curiosity about my cultural roots. I think we all have a desire to locate ourselves within a broader context, a longing to really understand our identity as part of a larger whole. At least, this has been the case for me. I've wondered about who I am and how I've become myself, as it were.

Recently, several of these pieces have fallen into place. And by recently, I mean tonight as I researched Welsh culture on Wikipedia. What prompted me to do this? I'm so glad you asked...

My grandmother, Betty Maclay, is no less than a remarkable woman. She is strong and faithful, one I am proud to call matriarch of my family. The Maclays are not, by nature, people who boast or even speak too freely of themselves, and so it is only in my recent adult years that I've learned enough of my Mama, as we call her, to understand the humble greatness that she carries with her.

So this post might be more about my Maclay and Boucher heritage, but Mama takes great pride in her Welsh roots so I consider it to be one and the same.

Let me try to piece this together for you the way it's come together for me. Perhaps the easiest way to start is to describe some salient traits of myself, and then talk about how these have emerged as significant trends in the noble ladies of my family. Of course, there have been great men as well, particularly my Papa who has gone to be with the Lord. But the strongest pull on my heart is what connects me with the Maclay women.

It's been obvious from an early age that I'm a strong-willed one. Just ask my mother. Also wild at heart, feisty if you will, and yet tender, romantic. I've always had a special fondness for Celtic lands and culture and wished that I could identify with them...I could just see myself standing on a moor in Britain, hair flying in the wind, intensely alive and fiercely strong. A bit dramatic, perhaps, but you see what I mean about the wildness and romanticism.

Somehow, I never put it together that Wales = Celtic. As I read a bit on Wikipedia, I learned about the early Briton/Saxon history of Wales, and the strong Celtic roots that are evident in Welsh culture. It all fits! My love for Celtic Woman makes sense! You laugh (Becca!), but this is joyful news for me. It's like finding the place where your edges fit perfectly, when all along you thought perhaps you were just awkwardly shaped.

But Wikipedia has nothing on my Mama's memoirs. She has recently been occupied with the task of recording significant memories, and I was fortunate to be forwarded a copy by my mother, who was typing them up for her. Never have I identified more strongly with a woman who came before me! These memoirs served as impetus for a fabulous conversation between my mother and me on the ways in which many traits seemed to pass down identically from Mama to her, and now to me. Allow me to explain...

The Maclay women are, above all, strong. When I say strong, I mean that strength that is dark and bright at the same time, fierceness and tenderness together. We take care of business, but I believe we pour our souls into it. We aren't an emotional bunch, per se, but our loyalties and love are evident in our service to those around us. Mama cared for the physical needs of everyone in her family, and watched each of her parents and four sisters pass into the Lord's presence. I believe that her Creator blessed her with a special strength for this, and that this quality is a mighty river that flows through her offspring. Both my mother and I commented to one another that we have always thought of ourselves as "the strong one"...and I think this was the first time we had shared this with each other. This is no coincidence to me.

The Maclay women are sentimental in our own way. Another theme in my conversation with my mother is that we believe ourselves to be unemotional. However, I don't think this is the case. Our emotions are often converted (sublimated, to use psychobabble) into acts of service...I've noticed this in both my mother and me, and it would not surprise me to learn that Mama is the same. I show my love in my provision, my labor for others, my desire to care for details, my presence, my offering of myself as a rock on which to lean. I can buckle down and care for practical matters when all around me are broken...the strong one. Yet my emotions for those closest to me are fiercely strong, and the first chords of certain songs can set me to tears because they tug at the ties that bind me to my family. "How Great Thou Art" is one, "I Hope You Dance" is another. Don't mess with my loyalty, don't cross my love.

The Maclay women are smart. We are an educated bunch, and we don't hesitate to seek answers and solve problems. I think this goes with the strength aspect of our traits - our minds are sharp and deftly wielded.

The Maclay women are faithful. A stronger legacy of faith I doubt you could find...it has been said of the Welsh that the first thing they would build upon arrival in America was a church (the French, a tradingpost; the German, a beer hall; the Welsh, a church). I am amazed at the conviction that has been passed through my mother's family. My name means "consecrated one", or "devoted to the Lord", and I believe this situates me firmly in this covenant heritage. In the midst of my Papa's illness and passing to glory, I witnessed such faith as I never thought possible. This is truly the source of their great strength. I felt so much admiration for these Maclays and such honor to be one of them - and immense gratitude to the Lord for this family.

Papa's death was very painful for me, but it also served as a hallmark in my identity formation as I came together for the first time as an adult with all the Maclays. My journey to Pennsylvania with Beth, hours spent alongside my mother and her sisters, my first true insights into the woman who is Betty Maclay, all came together in a powerful way to show me who I am. I had always thought of myself as a "Northern European mutt" with a mixed bag of cultural identities, but then I saw myself for the first time as part of a distinct line, particularly of women.

I am so proud to be a Maclay, even if that was two names and a generation ago for me. I consider myself to be a bearer of the name even though it was never on my official papers. I am also proud to be Welsh; even if the bloodline has been diluted through the generations, it is no less who I am.

I could write volumes more about this family, especially expanding to include the men like my Papa and his sons. I could fill books with my Steele legacy as well. But for now I am content to relish the continuity that connects mother with daughter throughout the generations. Like so many ladies of the moor holding strong against the squalling gale. For a moment I am not a wanderer; I am home.

On the Welsh
The Boucher Crest
WikiWales
Welsh National Anthem