On Brokenness and Healing

I think I am finally recovered enough to write about my ride-along on an overnight Medical Transport shift Sunday night.

Recovered from staying up all night, that is. It wasn't really very traumatic or emergency-ish. The worst that happened was watching Trish start an IV on a lady who was in bad shape and needed transport from her nursing home to an ER. Mostly the partners on my truck were moving people from dialysis to home, or from an ER to a bed or ER in another hospital. No emergencies for me to witness, which is actually ok with me. And here's a picture of where the magic happened:















During my 13 hours with Mitch and Trish, however, I had plenty of time for introspection regarding the medical/emergency field and the vastly differing perspectives one can have, from hospital staff to medical transport to patient to family member. Being in and out of hospitals, ERs, and dialysis centers allowed me to catch a glimpse of each of these kinds of people, and since I am not a "seasoned" medical professional my heart and mind remained open enough to consider each perspective and observe them in relation to one another.

From the perspective of medical personnel, each patient who comes through is viewed very objectively - and necessarily so. Of course there is the (hopefully) compassionate bedside manner to be managed, but the doctor, nurse, or EMT views the patient as a case and quickly analyzes the series of goals to be met and the steps required to move the patient along through each of these. Wes, a friend's husband who arranged the ride-along for his wife and me, explained that this is a vital part of their training (he is trained as an EMT and works for the medical transport company we rode along with). Too much emotion would be debilitating for the medical worker who must remain objective enough to function quickly and effectively and be able to cope with both success and failure. To one trained as a psychologist, these medical personnel sometimes came across as brusque or detached, but Wes emphasized that the role of medical staff is not to provide counseling. While they aim to provide compassionate care, their primary objective is to provide physical, not emotional, help.

More intriguing than the medical professionals themselves was the interaction between them and the patients. Perhaps the most memorable was a girl being wheeled into an ER on a stretcher, head and neck immobilized by a neck brace and strap across her forehead. Her male counterpart (husband? boyfriend?) was trotting beside the stretcher, holding her and and attempting to reassure her. They both seemed relatively calm considering the apparent situation, but I thought about the very different reactions between these lay people and the staff who assisted them. To the ER personnel, this was just another case....not in a cold or harsh way, but there was no panic or anxiety or realization that life might be drastically different from now on.

And that's what it comes down to, isn't it? For the ER staff, this is business as usual. To the girl lying on a stretcher, this is a huge, life-altering experience. Her life will never be the same, either because of lasting medical issues or due simply (simply?) to the emotional and potentially traumatizing effects of an emergency hospital visit. I couldn't imagine being in her shoes...or neck brace, as it were. To be lying flat on my back, unable to move, alone with my thoughts but for the attempted comforts of my husband. Would his words soothe my heart or calm my mind? Or would my insides be racing, crashing all over each other at the panic of possible paralysis?

A hospital is a place of great healing, but also often a place of great tragedy. The ER is the beginning of a very different life for some people. My heart broke for those I saw waiting in hospital beds for doctors to deliver a prognosis - for some, full of hope; for others, carrying the weight of an altered way of life. I hope I never harden to the great drama that happens in people's lives every single day...I am grateful for the opportunity to witness firsthand what goes on behind the scenes, even the small taste that it was. It was so helpful to watch and listen, to observe people's demeanors and reactions, to imagine the psychological effects of such an experience and to reflect on how I might be able to help these people approach emotional healing when I see them in my office one day.

We live in a fallen world, and life doesn't always give you good news. I thank the Lord for calling me to a profession in which I am privileged to come alongside people who are often experiencing the very brokenness of human existence. I pray that I will be strong enough to share the burden of pain, and wise enough to guide toward hope. I am only one person, but by God's grace I will call upon Him to help me help His children.